Choosing We

Keep those fancy things
Keep your magazine
I don't even want what I'm chasing
Because all I know isn't ordinary love is
What we're made for

So Ben Rector croons in his song, Ordinary Love.  In his lyrics, Rector penned . . .

gimme an ordinary love
that I touch
that I hold

Far too often, people miss out on tangible love because they fail to recognize the value of ordinary love. 

In regard to romantic love and the Ordinary Life, how does one go about enjoying an ordinary love?  To answer that question, one must first answer another.  Namely - what is ordinary romantic love?  Ordinary romantic love is . . .

one based in the desire to share life with another
one based on shared giving and receiving
dependent on trust
realistic in expectations
exclusive
God-honoring

Now, back to our first question.  How does one go about enjoying an ordinary love?  I offer some suggestions.  (I base them on my twenty-two and one half years of marriage experience to the woman of my life, my bride.)

1. Be kind.
2. Listen.
3. Hold hands.
4. Speak words of encouragement and love.
5. Date your spouse.
6. Know what your spouse enjoys.
7. Know what your spouse dislikes.
8. Be patient.
9. Be realistic.
10. Be thankful.

I agree with Rector that "ordinary love is what we're made for."  In any healthy romantic love, a couple will experience times of great joy and true pain, surprisingly amazing moments and profoundly frustrating events, and they will do so together. 

Ordinary love falls apart when one person (or both) in the relationship chooses "me" over "we."  Those who choose "me" abandon their life partner when their frustration with the one they love drives them into a life of romantic distancing or the arms of another.  Those who choose "we" continue in their commitment to love their mate even through the most trying times.  "We" trumps "me"!  Those who choose "we" live in a manner that provides a 3D picture of Ephesians 5:21.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

#ordinarylives